It's pretty obvious that I love music. I can't poetically describe the way that music makes me feel, but I can tell you that there is nothing else like it. A melody can carry you as far as your imagination allows, lyrics can open hearts or change a mind, and let's face it - the rhythm is eventually going to get you. (I can't claim credit for that joke - it's from an old 'Friends' episode!)
Anyway, my life would be severely less meaningful if music weren't a part of it. It's what I do; who I am, and I consider myself extremely lucky to be able to live with and create music everyday.
I started playing piano as a little kid; entering piano competitions, performing at recitals, you know the drill. I really liked it until about 8th grade, when I used to dread practicing and couldn't stand my lessons. It got to the point where my mom begged my piano teacher to let me play some songs other than Classical or Baroque music, and it was in high school that I was introduced to Scott Joplin. I can honestly say that Ragtime saved my music career! Maybe something else would have come along, who knows what would have happened, but I do know that I started practicing - and loved the piano again.
I went off to college with dreams of studying music, and it's exactly what I did. I can't say I loved every moment (I was not destined to become a concert pianist or music historian...) but I learned from some amazing musicians and started writing a lot of songs.
After my first semester of college I made a fateful trip to Oaxaca, Mexico, and it changed my life forever. After spending one week at the Casa Hogar children's home, everything was different. I made trips back to Oaxaca whenever I could. I got a job in college just so I could pay for my airfare. I went down to Oaxaca for summer vacation, our January interim, my spring break...I even met my husband on one of those trips...I really loved spending time with the kids, and one of our favorite pastimes together?? Singing and playing guitar! (I used to bring my guitar on every trip...you remember, the guitar that someone stole from me...at a church...you know the story. If not, you can read my New Life - Part 1 blog entry.)
It's really an incredible gift to be able to combine two passions and to have discovered them so early on in life. It can, however, be a bit of a balancing act. Working with impoverished children who have lived lives that we cannot truly understand, can at times seem much more noble and worthwhile than writing a song. There are days when I feel that taking time to work on a new song would be selfish. It can be tough to strike a balance between music and working in Mexico because art is less tangible than physically laying bricks to build a home for someone living in a garbage dump (the current project we're working on...)
On the other hand, I spent an hour last night talking with a nineteen-year-old girl (we just finished building the walls of her family's house this week) who has grown up in the dump, has only finished middle school, and dreams of one day being a singer. She was asking me a lot of questions about what I do in the U.S. and so I was telling her that mainly my life revolves around music. She thought it was really amazing that I went to music school, that I have written and recorded my own songs, and she asked if I thought she could one day study music as well. I told her all about Gaby (the 20-year-old girl who grew up at Casa Hogar and now lives with us in CT and is studying English before heading off to a four-year university) and the fact that Simply Smiles (the non-profit that Bryan - my husband - runs) wants to offer college educations to all of the children at Casa Hogar and the children who have grown up and are living in the Oaxacan dump.
To be honest, for this girl, I don't know what she'll think of as more important moving forward, the fact that someone came and built her family a new home, or the fact that someone believes in the value of her dream and is actually living proof that it's possible.
It would be an insult to this girl, and countless others like her, if I were to simply give up or quit pursuing music. I'm not saying that my songs are more of a gift to the world than anyone else's, but I am saying that I'm pretty sure I could easily find a few people willing to switch lives with me.
I don't know if you can make any sense of my wandering train of thought, since I can barely follow it, but for me, last night affirmed what I already knew. I've got two passions, and that's a good thing! One's not better than the other, and I don't think my life would be complete without both of them. Thank goodness for late-night conversations on the bus ride home to the dump, huh??
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